::SEEDS OF LOVE::

from The Rules of Attraction

Got you, you are mine now for the rest of the day, week, month, year, for life. Have you guessed who I am? Sometimes when your scanning a crowd I feel those sultry dark eyes of yours stop on me. Are you too afraid to come up to me and let me know how you feel? I want to moan and writhe with you,and I want to go up to you and kiss your mouth and pull you to me and say "love you, loveyou, loveyou, loveyou" while stripping. I want you so bad it stings.I wanna kill the ugly girls you're always with.Do you really like those boring, naive, coy, calculating girls, or is it just for sex? These seeds of love have taken hold and if we won't burn together, I'll burn alone.

:::MY HIDDEN PARADISE:::

There is a place in the world hidden in the same passage of the sun...

Native of the night, placed in an improbable alcohol and sugar archipelago...

Simply light, like a wing of bat supported in the breeze...

Fruity, simply fluvial, and material. Nevertheless simply torrid and kicked like an adolescent in the hips. Simply sad and pressed. Sincerely rustic and depopulated...

In truth. With two million in it...in the meantime adds to life and four cardinal mountain ranges and one immense bay and another immense bay...

Some love will think that in this fluvial place in which the Earth appears like a broken vein that spills and, where the day has its true triumph...

This love will break its solitary innocence. But no, it will think that in the middle of this increased earth, where it wants, where mountains by valleys like fresh blue currencies roll, where it sleeps in every forest and in each flower... life...where my Paradise hides...

::RECUERDO ASFIXIANTE::

Casi te desnudé en plena calle y estarías de acuerdo que la ropa nos asfixiaba fueron los besos, las caricias, en ese momento te expresé que gente en la calle nos veia, solo a nosotros dos, no se si los besos, tus manos o las mías no se si ese cariño increíble junto a tu aroma o esa boca tuya, mía.

Estarías de acuerdo conmigo que la ropa provocaba un acento asfixiante en nuestros cuerpos que casi te desnudé en plena calle, a 20 metros de la esquina de tu casa y justo en frente del mar, pero, a cada minuto sin cesar la policia salía a rondar de a parejas y otras veces uno que otro acompañado con su libreta de multas y no nos dejaban tranquilos en ese terrible calor que entre tu yo tratábamos de calmar con modos particulares. Tú, tus manos, yo, las mías y la poca ropa que ya tenías. Casi te desnudé en plena calle. Qué habría dicho tu madre?, que habría dicho la mía? eso que importa, solo queríamos remediar ese terrible asfixiar que entre tu y yo teníamos.

Tu boca húmeda, tu cuerpo húmedo y tus manos que me querían... Cada vez que paso por esa esquina, bajo los arboles que nos daban sombra ese verano y nos ocultaba en las noches, recuerdo como tratabamos de remediar ese calor que sentíamos. Tus manos en mi espalda, en mi pecho, mis manos en tu espalda y los besos, en tu cuello y en tu pecho , tu boca. Tu y yo sabiamos que a metros de mi casa siempre nos deteniamos, yo te decía que me iba, tu me llamabas con cualquier excusa, me tomabas por las caderas y me abrazabas fuertemente a ti, besabas mi cuello siempre terminabas besando mas abajo del cuello pues sabías que eso quería como tu tambien lo querías... tu respirar y el mío se aceleraban y sentia tu aroma con el mio inundar todo ese pequeño mundo que habiamos creado en pocos segundos.

Recuerdo como ayer esas noches cuando me quedaba en tu cama, cuando mis padres viajaban a brasil o al norte de Chile, creo que hasta Australia. Y podia encender mi corazon y cuerpo con tu ser al hacer el amor y dormir abrazados toda la noche. Mas de alguna vez desperté pensando en que ellos llegaban y yo en tu cama aun dormia... que habria dicho tu madre? que habria dicho la mia...? desperte sobresaltada muchas veces creyendo escuchar tu nombre en la boca de tu padre o tu madre.

Asfixiantes noches de inviernos y primaveras que jamas olvidaré frente al mar. Mas de algún policía nos habría pillado en alguna ocasión, pero siempre disimulabamos, tu lo hacías mejor que yo...

Casi me desnudaste en plena calle, recordarás como yo que la ropa nos provocaba un calor asfixiante... fueron tus manos, quizás fueron las mias...

::PAIN::

Pain. You just have to write it out. Find the wound to make it heal. There are no solutions, no easy answers, you just breathe deep and wait for it to end. Most of the times pain can be managed, but sometimes it gets to you when you least expect it. Pain? You just have to fight through because the truth is you can't out run it.

Maybe we like the pain. Maybe we're wired that way. Because without it, I don't know; maybe we just wouldn't feel real. What's that saying? "Why do I keep hitting myself with a hammer?Because it feels so good when I stop".

The Big Sky

I got this ego that got knocked down walking real slow staring at the ground.A million loners wake up every day. My life's not over just twisted out of place. Stop in my tracks to watch the clouds get tossed around... Suddenly that's all I can think about ...I've got the big sky to hold me, I've got my whole life unfolding. There's nobody to talk to so don't tell me that I need you. I'm on the other side of being lonely I've got the whole sky to hold me... I Take the train home almost every night and I talk to strangers just to feel alive. So I asked this lady when I was feeling bold "Am I going crazy or is this just getting old?" Half smiling she told me she misses being young when every moment just strikes the passion. She said "Girl, let yourself cry. You and your fears of feeling lost don't calculate the cost" I've got the big sky to hold me. I've got my whole life unfolding. There's nobody to talk to so don't tell me that I need you . I'm on the other side of being lonely ...

I've got the whole sky to hold me. Sometimes my skin is streched so far You can see right through into my beating heart .It's just a growing thing. Just when I think I'm gonna shrivel up I can feel the craving of love running through my veins and that'll never change I've got the whole sky to hold me, temporarily lonely And I needed to talk too just to find out I don't need you I've got the big sky to hold me, I've got my whole life unfolding There's nobody to talk to. So I'm starting up strong and new. I'm on the other side of being lonely.I've got the whole sky to hold me...

::SURVIVING::

The key to surviving college is denial. We deny that we're tired, we deny that we're scared, we deny how badly we want to succeed. And most importantly, we deny that we're in denial. We only see what we want to see and believe what we want to believe, and it works. We lie to ourselves so much that after a while the lies start to seem like the truth. We deny so much that we can't recognize the truth right in front of our faces

CHEERS 2007!!::I Propose and I hope::

The year 2006 was a good year and the good thing about the end of the year, is the beginning of a new one.

I believe Happiness is that sense of being with ourselves knowing what we are not and knowing what will never be and accept it. Trying to correct our defects and being better than the day before. We should try that more often.

The perfect man does not exist. If it would exist it would turn out to be a boring one. Someone told me that humans only stop having temptations when they are dead. That humans are capable of betrayal against themselves and conquer the impossible until the last moment. Here lies the secret of life and happiness or peace, whatever you may call it. Being human is being in a constant struggle and search.

2007 comes accompanied by dark omens. An inminent war, terrorism spread around the world, galoping inflation, the poor poorer, the kingdom of individualism multiplied by infinity, lack of faith, the dissapearing of ideals, the eagerness to have instant riches, lies as flags of men and governments. If anyone feels like adding more to these inventories you are welcome to do so, do it at your own risk and you may achieve a splendid depression if you choose to keep them.

Parting from the fact that life is too short and that we only have one to live, they have told me that if you clone yourself you can live longer. Those who are eager to stay, perhaps they will have new experiences to live. Us who have just this life to live, we have to defend it and take advantage of what's left of it. I propose that we seriously commit with happiness and honesty. That we fight the lack of love and hopelessness with exercises that help us become capable of stopping and preventing new waves that invade the world to strain in our world. I propose changes that do not depend on international organizations or governments, or depend on currency variations or painful tests.

Do the inventory of your life one more time (I do it every year) and decide intensely that you will be happy and that to be happy you will fight with all your strenghts the fear, the madness and the ideas that are sold to us everyday. Each of us can create our own recipe. Don't look at what you don't have, be grateful for what you have, embrace it and value it. Learn to love life with passion. Forget what you have lost, if you have to cry for it then do it for very little time. It does not make sense to cry for it irremediably. Forgive, forgive everything, it is the most important step to achieve true peace. I know it's hard but let it go into the hands of your God, if you have one, and if you don't have one let it go anyways. It will always come back to you with blessings or you will just have that sweet sensation that you have grown and you can continue to grow. Be friends with your silence, there is no better advisor.

Learn to love in pain. You can only trully love when it hurts, when it's hard to do it, when we have to give up our preferences for the ones of the loved one. That is the most difficult lesson to learn. We generally love when love is in harmony with our most intimate appetites. We love the son that pleases us, we love the friend who always agrees with our thoughts and actions, we love the partner who obeys our whims. True love takes time and it definitely hurts, but it is the one that pulls us nearer to God. I have learned to love my friends because of their defects more than their virtues.

Yesterday someone told me that young people get tired fast from loving. Once passion disappears they start to discover the defects and tons of motives to undo the commitment. Another added that young people get married thinking about divorce as an alternative. I am a young person, I don't want to think I am part of these ideas. I once heard a girl say "I will try it out and see how it goes", and she was talking about her future marriage as if she was betting to the horses. Since that day I knew she was destined to failure and it happened.

It's the beginning of a new year, excuse my writtings.

I wish for you the best of the years. A year of self discovery, of faith, of reinforcement of personal struggles, a year of acceptance of what you have. I hope that kindness grows in people's hearts around the world this year. Watch out for those waves of panic and the fabrication of lies that trouble and disturb our intimate realities. I hope that commitment grows with those who have less, that compassion is multiplied to others.

I think the best gift we could give is our time to those we love and love us, just time.

Life is a breeze, so let's breathe happiness and contaminate others.

Have a wonderful year 2007.